Sometimes It’s Easy Being Me and Sometimes It’s Not So Easy Being Me…

I've been having certain and intermittent issues with my new computer I built these past few weeks. I’ve gotten the dreaded BSOD (blue screen of death) a few times which is just not acceptable in my book. I finally narrowed down to a software and old driver issue by the process of elimination.  It was the AMD television tuner card where I can watch and record TV on my computer. Windows 7 (built upon Vista) was using an old Windows Vista driver. I never really use it so took it out and stashed it on the shelves of numerous computer parts which I have deemed the bone yard or computer graveyard.  We are now BSOD free and I am keeping my fingers crossed for the time being. 

Meals On Wheels…

Charlie brought Maggie and I Zaxby’s chicken fingers for supper last night. Charlie was on his way back from taking Horsefly to the movies like he does every Sunday evening. I really shouldn’t be blogging about food as I normally do. I am obsessed. Oh well, you can’t please everybody. They were delicious and Maggie ate a whole box to herself.  She was one happy canine friend. These kind little surprising joys make living nice for Maggie and I.. 

A Fickle Wind of Change Blows…

That seems to be the nature of my mental disability.  Fickle.  I can't figure the madness out.  One great day of awesomeness or two that are torturous affairs with me in the bed all day.  It has no rhyme or reason.  Dad is saying I have depression and always have.  I’ll wait for a doctor's diagnosis.

Shiny Little Baubles…

Maggie was sitting very close to me on the couch as we pushed our boundaries and standard decorum as I ate some leftover macaroni and cheese ala Helen.  I swear it tastes even better the next day. And for breakfast as well.

“You can give me some, too?” she seemed to imply as she licked her lips and watched my every move. “If you don’t then I am going to sit here and look as pitiful as I can as if I am malnourished and starving to death.” 

I went and put some macaroni and cheese in the microwave on a paper plate as I then watched Maggie wolf it down as if she hadn’t been fed in weeks.

“You didn’t even taste it Maggie,” I told her with an amused look on my face as I chuckled. “You eat too damned fast.”

Now, it is time to pop some popcorn, pull up a comfy chair, and watch as Maggie tries to maneuver that rather large and inflexible Tupperware plate through the dog door.

The Impetuousness of a Three Year Old…

“What do you want our dear Helen to cook tomorrow?” my father asked me last night when he got up to head home.

“I would absolutely love Helen’s macaroni and cheese,” I replied ecstatically and with excitement, and also with a glimmer of hope in my eyes. (Helen will cook for an army and it will give me plenty of leftovers for next week.  Mom and my father rarely eat leftovers for some reason)  

“I am getting Helen to cook some Swiss steak tomorrow as well,” my father said, putting in his best two cents. “She  hasn’t cooked that in forever.”  

Charlie stopped by also as I was heading to the bed.

“Do you and dad ever sleep?” I asked with genuine interest and a glowing smile.

I was on my last leg at that point, but welcomed Charlie inside. Charlie had brought me turnip greens and sour cream and garlic mashed potatoes.  The the cornbread muffins were awesome as well. Charlie’s wife is an incredible cook.    

A Quiet and Sleepy House…

I think Maggie was even more surprised than I was when we both slept until 7:00 this morning missing our walk. I opened my eyes to a very dark and very cold bedroom as I stirred. I turned on my iPad and checked the temperature and it was pretty mild outside at 57 degrees.  I didn’t want to get up this morning with such warm and comfortable sheets and a comforter as well.  Maggie was laying next to me like the good soul she is.  As is my custom, I started a pot of coffee and got some bacon frying. The frying bacon was driving Maggie crazy.  I was also exceptionally ravenously hungry this morning.  I am not a big coffee drinker, but do drink coffee during the cold months with lots of cream and sugar added. I want to try those new Bailey’s coffee creamers and see if the taste as good as they look. The toasted hazelnut flavor sounds nice and looks delicious.     

I weighed myself last night and I have gained two more pounds.  This will surprise my father greatly. The outlook on getting that wireless mouse and keyboard looks more and more promising every day.  I have been eating my self out of house and home though.  I am on the see food and devour it phase of my diet. 

Confusion Grand Central Station…

Wait! Let me put on my x-large tinfoil hat and then we can get started! 9 out of 10 schizophrenics agree that it keeps out the wayward thoughts about demons and visions, and all untoward things.

I got all confused and out of my gourd yesterday morning. A surefire senior with Alzheimer's moment.  I thought I had to go into work, but it was Sunday.  I sat in the parking lot with my lunch for many minutes until I realized that fact – the fact was that I was off until Monday.  This was actually Sunday. I was eating my precious egg salad sandwiches on the drive home -- kind of relieved I didn't have to volunteer. The egg salad sandwiches were driving me crazy as well.  I am constantly hungry these days.  It was a feeling of being lost and having extreme vertigo. This is not the first time for this to happen to me in the past few months.  I feel much, much better this morning.  My callous father replied that all my diets were screwing up my head.

“You’re going to get your electrolytes messed up,” He aggravatingly told me about my diet as I watched my father heading home. “At least you’ve gained some weight back.” 

Isn’t he such a sweetheart? Do you sell derision with your admonishment?  Throw in some profanity while you are at it. That will be the dessert.

In Other News…

Now, Glitter Girl has me hooked on Nick Drake.  I just had to order all his compact discs.  My favorite album so far is Pink Moon.

Violently Happy…

“Come on stinker,” I told Maggie as I put on her harness and we headed out the door posthaste around 4am this morning.

Maggie wiggled crazily upon seeing the leash come out of the closet as I laughed.  She was like, “Why, my friend, didn’t you ask sooner? You know? I am always up for a walk!”

Oh my dear jubilant soul! Maggie can really be endearing some days.  They say dogs take on the habits and the minds of their owners.  I'm starting to believe this as well. I would be blessed to be Maggie’s doppelganger.

I had on my warmest clothing like my thick flannel lined blue jeans. My knit wool hat was pulled down way over my ears as it tried to fight off the cold as well. Ah, wool, you are my scratchy friend. Did you know that wool is one of the few natural fabrics that can keep you warm even if you get wet?  I found that out pretty fortuitously during my homeless days. Luckily, no squirrel tortillas today for Maggie and I to squabble about. Maggie and I both can have a singular of focus and headstrong most days to a razor sharp degree. We are like bickering siblings. 

My Lunch is Fixed and Back to the Old Grind I Go…

My father made egg salad yesterday.  He gave me enough to fix two sandwiches.  That is what I am taking to volunteering for lunch.

32 Degrees of Joy (sarcasm)…

It was literally freezing this morning at 32 degrees when I arose and got up and going. Dad had told me last night that we got a pretty good frost the night beforehand. He said he could see it on his roof before he drove to work. Frost means the smell of burning leaves, pumpkins, costumed children, and candied apples.

“No walk this morning girl,” I solemnly told Maggie rubbing her head as I sat on the edge of the bed getting dressed. “We are going to wait till this afternoon and when it’s warmer and the wind settles down.”

I immediately set my heat to 78 degrees (it was 64 in here) and got a pot of Maxwell House coffee percolating hoping that would help warm my frigid hands and body. I was going to make up our not walking by fixing Maggie's favorite breakfast meal. It’s one of mine favorite conciliation meals as well.

We had the last of the Clarke Brother’s sausage in the fridge (soon, I will have to make a sojourn to Roanoke, Alabama to buy more), scrambled eggs, slices of cheddar cheese, and grits,  I also cooked some canned biscuits which we ate with strawberry preserves and they were pretty good. Dad had told me to try them the other day. He recommended them as he handed me the grocery store sack.

I am sure the day will be spent daydreaming in front of this computer as I often can do these days.  With all the college football action as well, then nobody will come over so that will mean less social stress on me.

Helen Friday!!!

“What’s the special event, dad?” I asked my father last night after he had told me Helen was cooking a special meal tomorrow.

Dad only gets Helen to cook her special fish supper on a rare occasion. Usually when guests are coming like Charlie and family. Helen also needs this special kind of fish (Alaskan Pollack?) that can be hard to find at times as well. The days of having a local fish monger are long, long gone.  Most of the time she can find it at the Piggly Wiggly thankfully.

“Your mother just wants Helen’s fish supper for some reason,” dad replied. “I obliged.”

Mom will arrive at 3pm like clockwork with my meal and it will be time to eat. Helen’s fish dinner is one of her tastier meals.

Charlie’s Presence Graces Us…

Charlie was really busy over at his house next to mine and my house as well last night.  I had complained earlier in the week that my toilet was broken merely as a conversation starter.  Charlie brought me a new toilet seat.  The old one was like playing on a slip-n-slide while you were doing your business. This is the second toilet seat in two months.

On a Side Note of TMI…

Dad asked me as an aside last night if I browsed the internet with my iPad while I was using the toilet.  I laughed heartily at the question and told my father I, too, have succumbed.  It has taken over the conventional magazine’s role.   I can’t tell you how many National Geographic’s I have read over the years while sitting on the toilet before I got my iPad.

Did I Tell You Maggie Caught a Rather Large Rat Last Night?

I was about to go to bed.  I was sitting in the den after dark with my iPad in my lap and the television on when Maggie walks in with something rather large and furry in her mouth. 

“Maggie? Come here doll,” I carefully said not wanting her to run back out the dog door.

I had good enough sense last night to throw it out the front door and not the back.  She would have just brought it back in if I threw it out the back.

The Things Moms Do…

Mom helped me get Maggie out to the veterinarian the other day. 

“Yeah,” Dr. Thomas, our veterinarian said. “She’s got seasonal allergies and very dry skin.”

He gave me a vial of diphenhydramine tablets which is Benadryl in layman's terms. One pill and Maggie is out for hours like an instant coma.  We also got some $25 dry skin conditioning shampoo. Too rich for my blood.  I am going to use Val’s recipe or some others online for anti dry skin lotion from now on.

My mother is the “can do” person in the family when it comes to pet care,  I don’t know what I would do without her. She takes her role very seriously as well just as if Maggie was one of her very own children.

Quiet As A Church Mouse…

It was so quiet on Maggie’s and my walk this morning.  The streets were devoid of traffic. It was overcast and the sky glowed orange from all the streetlamps in town. My grandmother would have called it as quiet as a church mouse. We walked just before dawn as everybody still slept.  Even the normal rascals aka neighborhood dogs were eerily quiet today.  I shuddered every time the frigid cold wind would blow this morning.

Hocus Pocus…

I wish I could wave my magic wand. My poor, miserable Maggie.  She just walked past me and this computer desk trying to get a certain cootie problem fixed and under control.  She must be miserable. It is walk, stop and scratch. Repeat. She’s been scratching up a storm since about midnight.  I couldn’t find a flea on her, but will give Maggie her Frontline flea treatment this afternoon even though it is traumatic for her to get it. You would think I was poking her with a firebrand when I apply it.

Given Up the Good Alms…

I keep getting up and waking earlier and earlier. It just happens that way with me sometimes. Hopefully, my internal clock will reset soon as it often will and can do.  Maggie looked entirely frustrated at my rising from the dead at 3:00 am the morning and turning on the bedroom lamp until I said the magic word… Walk.  She was ready to go then.  I hope to walk until McDonalds opens and then I will buy Maggie and I two sausage biscuits and we will enjoy them when we get home.  Charlie slipped a few dollars in my pocket before he left last night just for this kind of occasion.  .

What is your favorite Sonic drink and/or meal?

Mine is the cherry limeade.  I can’t get enough of that stuff. I just wish it wasn’t so expensive or I would drink it every day. Hey, that’s what daydreams are made of aren’t they? I am also quite enamored with the Sonic “Coney” hotdog and tots.

Charlie Feeds the World…

Usually, about once or twice a year, many churches in the South throw these big barbeque chicken shindigs as fundraisers.  You get a quarter of a chicken, slaw, potato chips, and 2 slices of loaf bread. The formula is usually always the same and is usually consistently very good.

I am not joking when Charlie told me he had bought enough plates for 20 people when he arrived here. He had me go look in the Chevrolet's trunk. I got two and the rest were to be redistributed around between family and friends.

“Well, you are definitely not the 4 hookers I ordered this morning.” I argued goodheartedly as I opened the door. “All I got was this lousy chicken plate.”

Charlie burst out laughing and I laughed as well.

“Stick to the chicken,” Charlie told me. “It will keep you out of trouble.”

Saying Thanks…

Thank you Mr. Pipe Tobacco.  You, sir, are a good friend and I miss you. You are very appreciated. It’s hard not having you around or hearing from you for a period of time.  Pipe Tobacco and a guy name long haired Steve were the first two people to read my fledgling posts on my very first blog.  My first blog was named Homeless and Disabled in Alabama. Clueless and to the point, eh? lol It didn’t garner much respect from the people that were reading as I was wallowing in self pity at that time having just gotten out of a nasty soul destroying divorce. 

My Mother Rocks!

I got home very, very late last night with my sodas and some snacks my mother graced me with. Mom thrust the bag upon me as I walked out the back door.

“Don’t eat and drink them all tonight,” my mother told me with a smile as I left.

Mom, knows me all too well. Mom had put in with my sodas a super big package of my favorite cheese on wheat crackers.  I love it when she does something like that totally surprising me. It made our day. It was both a huge boon and Maggie and I both had a pack of crackers when I got home -- a moral booster.  I am not hard to please am I? 

A Chicken Liver of a Day…

“I forgot. You don’t like chicken livers, do you?” My father asked me sheepishly as we sat on the couch last night. “That’s what I am getting our Helen to cook in the morning.”

“They’re okay,” I replied visibly disappointed.  “They just have a strong aftertaste. Maybe Helen can once again work her magic.”

“Helen could make a gravy covered dishrag taste good,” Dad said as he chuckled in closing and he smiled as he left and went on home. We had to check Maggie’s food and water first, though.

Later this morning, Maggie had a barking hissy fit as did every other dog in the neighborhood simultaneously. It was like mass canine pandemonium.

“Ah hell,” I told Maggie unlocking her dog door “Go out and bark like crazy this morning. Raise hell!!! Get it out of your system.”

She wasn’t out long. She’s my supreme protector after all. I had to let her do her job and that needed to be gotten out of Maggie’s system.   

Some Things Grow, Something's Change, and Something's Stay the Same.

Often at 4am you can find me in the kitchen frying some sausage and other breakfast accruements. Maggie will be unabashedly underfoot during this time as she was this morning. She always gets an ample plate as well, never fail, but she is not going to let me forget. She is as impetuous as a as a small spoiled child. We had scrambled cheese eggs this morning.  We also had Clarke Brother’s sausage and that was an awesome treat. I had let it start defrosting in the sink before I went to bed.

Passed With Fine Muster…

Two weeks ago, I think I weighed 140 pounds or close to it.  Yesterday, I weighed 152 pounds at the pharmacy during our 2 week fat gestation process.  My father was just ecstatic and beside himself.  He hopes we will climb back up to 170 and stay that way (I will be 20 pounds overweight, btw). 

“Keep on doing what your doing,” he told me with excitement. “You’re going to have that nice new keyboard and mouse before you know it.”

It was consoling that I had a “prize” on the way so all transgressions were forgiven. I have pieced together and built a pretty decently nice computer these past few months and hope to keep it updated and on the cutting edge of computer technology. Next, I want a Logitech wireless keyboard and wireless mouse (If I can just gain more weight).

You Better Watch Out Phone Company…

Mom has been battling the phone company for a few days saying their phone was broken.  They’ve come over three times and couldn't fix the problem. Mom is as tenacious as a pit-bull when dealing with stuff like this and proceeded to have another volley of tit for tat with Knology.  Needless to say the phone got fixed yesterday. I was the one that got the inaugural phone call.  Mom was very excited. Another of life’s little victories that can make us feel accomplished and proud. I know the phone company had a headache after all that rigmarole with regards to my mother.    

Play it Again, Sam!

My life is like a broken record these days stuck in a groove on a certain tune.   It makes for terrible and poor blog writing fodder, but I guess should be very happy it’s a groove I enjoy.  “Play it again, Sam,” I would holler out to the bartender as he fixed me another drink. 

I left volunteering a moment ago to pick up some things for lunch.  I was running late this morning having the Tuesday morning blues.  A Nissan Stanza (remember those from the 80’s?) pulled in next to me and three desperados got out out looking extremely, extremely shady. These were some desperate looking men.  I did do something nice today by donating some candy to needy and poverty stricken children.  They wrote my name on a orange paper pumpkin and stuck it on the store’s door.

My spidey sense has been on alert this morning crazy like something is about to happen – a catastrophe of sorts like the men I eyed. Let’s hope it is a false alarm. After a life time of high strangeness, you never know what will happen next.      

A Burgeoning Complex…

Normally, Maggie is not a very or overly affectionate dog.  We both set boundaries as far as personal space goes that we never usually break.  She’s been so affectionate though lately and I hope she continues to be like that.  I think and believe she gets tired of having the house to herself for four to five hours every morning. You know that old saying about distance making the heart grow fonder.  I also hope she doesn’t think I will leave her.  She always barks at me loudly through the front house window as I walk to the car to volunteer everyday.

Hot + Damn = It’s Grocery Day…

“What do you want for grocery day?” my mother asked me last night ready to take notes. 

“I am in a hotdog mood,” I replied to my mother. “Get me the stuff to make lots of hotdogs. 

“You want those Hebrew National franks you love?” She then asked me and I said yes.

That will give me something good to think about and obsess over before I get home. My last request was honey buns that are divine after worming them in the microwave.   

A Requiem for the Day…

It has been quiet, overcast, and rainy day here at Andrew’s casa so far.  My father and I just rode down to the Valley for a couple of McDoubles and some sodas.  This has gotten to be a habit between us every Sunday evening. If you are on a diet then I heartily recommend them to put on extra weight, yet they are less filling. 

Dad keeps making innuendos and statements about me going to live in a “life style” living arrangement for adults that need help with living, organizing, and maintaining life.  He does so from time to time and I just ignore it. I am perfectly sane mind you and I hope you that read everyday don’t think of me as being stark raving mad. Well, maybe just a wee, little bit.

Well, the tub has been running about 15 minutes to fill with hot water.  I bid you all adieu while I go soak awhile, read, and  then go to bed.    

A Somber Music Appreciator...

Music is the name of the game as I collect more and more music and albums.  I especially enjoy somber melancholy compositions that are less vocal. Some can be downright depressing, but most are just solemnly and sonically interesting in a good way.  I hope this isn’t the harbinger of things to come as far as my life goes mimicking the music I like to hear. I equally enjoy some pretty exciting and eclectic pop tunes as well so I guess it evens all out in the wash I hope.

Maggie Leads the Way…   

Maggie and I have been on our walk already this morning.  Maggie has a new interesting and endearing habit where she will sit with me on the couch every morning very close to me until we are ready to go. Touching me as she lay next to me must give her some sense of comfort.  I’d say we walked around two miles today.  I see these people online walking six miles everyday and I envy them.  I want to be able to walk that far again. 

Silent Nights and an Even More Quiet Days,,,

It has been an uncommonly quiet and silent day at the Literacy Center this morning – a fitting end to another very busy volunteer week.  I almost feel as if I am here alone.  The walls seem to echo noise as if they were empty rooms abound without furniture and carpet.

Personally? I am browsing www.newegg.com for what I want for Christmas -- daydreaming for what seems like hours.  I have $500 dollars to spend.  I know I am getting another Acer computer monitor like the one I got a few weeks ago. That will be $299.99 right there for a 27 inch LCD monitor. Once you’ve lived with two computer monitors for awhile then you can never go back to only one.

October slipped up upon us as the cool days and colder nights grow ever more apparent to me.  It has been a rather nice fall after a very warm and hot summer. Maggie has been enjoying her crisp and cool walking forays in the very early mornings.  I am already thinking of getting a pumpkin and big bowls of candy for Halloween night. I was amusing myself a moment ago about putting a sign in my front lawn “No Cheap and Crappy Candy Here!”

It’s Them Doggone Days…

I was just sitting in the break room a moment ago enjoying my over processed swine. 

“Watch’ya eating?” one of our ever more busybody and nosey volunteers asked as she was warming up her lunch in the microwave.

“Potted meat and saltine crackers,” I remarked as I took another bite with a squirt of Louisiana hot sauce.

She turned up her nose at my choice of cuisine as I urged her to try a can with some crackers. “Blech!” she exclaimed. “Don’t you know that potted meat has more than its fair share of the more interesting parts of the pig in it?” she proceeded.

“Each to his own,” I muttered under my breath completely unfazed. I even had a slight grin on my face as I was so amused.

My lunch today was what my grandmother would call “fishing food” as it would commonly accompany us on our forays down to the pond as a snack.

The Great American Weigh In…

“You know we weigh you next Tuesday.  Don’t feign anxiety attack and not come to the pharmacy saying you can’t drive,” my father told me with a stern look last night ready to brace us for the worst and to hope for the best. 

I really have been putting in a more concerted effort to gain weight.  I’ve gotten to where I eat a decent supper before I retire to bed and I think that has been for the best and has helped.  I just can’t get too full, feel full, or I will feel sick and will purge thus eating my large meal of the day before retiring. It’s like a feeling of panic that you are going to get obese again.

“You do look better,” my father kindly told me patting me on my knee. “I thought we were going to lose you to yet another addiction. You looked gaunt.”

I explained to my father about eating small meals and more more meals per day were helping immensely.  Small portion sizes have helped the most out of everything I’ve tried. I will always be a Foodie at heart, though. 

Take a Left at Eighth Avenue…

As usual, Maggie was overly excited about our walk the morning.  The temps had moderated some and it was only 46 degrees today. I know my more northern readers are laughing at that silly fool in the Valley. “That’s not cold!”

Until I Saw Your Pitiful Face…

I opened the front door this chilly morning and a blast of cold hit me in the face freezing me to the bone.  The coldest night of the Fall so far. I think the low was 36 degrees this morning in Lagrange. I abhor the cold with a passion as some of you may already know or remember.

“Sorry Maggie,” I said as I closed the front door, snuggled up in a warm blanket on the couch, and began to watch TV and browse with my iPad. We still had a few hours left before dawn.

Maggie gave me the most pitiful and awful look she could muster and she  just lay her head in between her paws watching me.  She just looked at me and hoped that any movement at all would result in us going for our walk.

“All right! All right!,” I exclaimed as I put Maggie’s harness on her.

Ms. Wiggles wiggled joyously and started to bark she was so happy.   And off I was to brave the cold.

Helen is in da House…

“Baby?” Helen asked me Friday. “You think you could eat two fried chicken breasts?”

I hungrily and very excitedly nodded yes.  Helen had just called me over to pick up my food.  The rutabagas were especially nice, but Helen says they hurt her arthritic hands to cut up into cubes. I was greedily eying the chicken breast to be cut up and put in sandwiches with lots of Blue Plate mayo. I’ll have to find some interesting and different bread to make the sandwiches with as I imagined shopping at Kroger. I settled on rye even though I’ve eaten that constantly for months now.  .

I Can See a Lot of Life in You Yet…

I am in serious, serious music hoarder mode right now. A big box of new compact discs arrives almost weekly to my great anticipation. A few weeks will pass most likely and my attentions will be deflected to other venues of captivation and hobbies of mine. I can be so very capricious at times. I hit the ground running on this music obsession this time, though.  It all started out with iTunes and a Paula Cole compact disc.

My current fascination is Sufjan Stevens. Very, very interesting music to say the least.  I have been so very starved for the unconventional in music as of late.  I don’t ever want to hear another pop star again or weekend top 40 hit. Apple’s iTunes ingenious Genius feature has been a Godsend in finding all this music.

“Do you want a back scratch or go for our walk?” I asked Maggie this morning as I slipped my tennis shoes on as I sat on the couch. It was still pitch black dark outside.

“Ah, you can just have both. Isn’t life easier with options?” I asked Maggie as I smiled and scratched her back.

Maggie seemed invigorated with the 40 degree temperatures outside the morning.  I couldn’t wait to get home out of the cold and write this blog post.